Sunday, 24 February 2008

"The Ghosts of Weatherfield" Part 1


part 1


Out in the farthest reaches of the solar system, in the cold, empty silence of space, the entity moved at phenomenal speed. Unseeing, unfeeling and yet percieving, locked in the silence of pure energy, it craved organic existance, as it had done for thousands of years.
And now.... it sensed life.... not so far away now.....Passing the outer planets , covering unimaginable distances in an instance, the entity homed in on the planet of life, the planet of sustinence..... earth.
Moving through the outer atmosphere, untouched by friction or heat, but transfixed with wonder and desire, the entity descended over the islands at the edge of the continent and over the city... Manchester.It sensed the people, the emotions, the energy.
Descending over an ordinary street in Weatherfield, the entity splintered.....

At Number 11, Elsie Tanner stood over the dinner table glaring at her son Dennis:
"I won't 'ave it, do you hear me Dennis Tanner? Its time you found a proper job."
"Oh give ovver mam" Dennis retorts.But Elsie isn't finished, she turns and faces her daughter, Linda Cheveski:
"And how about you and Ivan talking about your problems instead of just walking out on him again".
The entity splinter seeps through the roof into the walls, the very fabric of the house.

In the Rovers Return snug, Ena Sharples, Minnie Cauldwell and Martha Longhurst are gossiping over their second glass of stout:
"Eee I hear that Elsie Tanner's been seein' a new fella" Martha says:Ena scowls:
"When isn't she? Brazen that one."
The entity splinter seeps into the walls of the pub, soaking in the sounds, the emotions.....The entity permeates through every house and through the very cobbles of the street.


At number 13, Hilda and Stan Ogden are having another disagreement:
"... an I want 'em gone by Friday. I'm not 'avin that yard clogged up with cages full of hens that won't lay."
Stan looks up from the racing pages of the paper:
"They will lay in time."Eddie Yeats chips in:"Yeah steady on 'ilda, they need to settle in."
Hilda glares at him:
"Look 'ere Eddie Yeats , I'm telling ya, get 'em shifted by the end of the week or shift yourself out."Deep within the walls of the house, the entity soaks up the energy... feeling closer to the higher existance of matter....


Ben and Katie Ryan are enjoying a drink in the Mermaid Wine Bar, along with hummus and greek salad while the Doctor shows Donna round the sights and sounds of Cambridge.
"Look Ben, you need to see things for how they really are," Katie says: "that boy is using you. You give him the complete run of your flat, he lives off your food and you just don't seem bothered."
Ben sips his absinthe:"Its not like that Katie. Kyle has become a major asset to me on investigations."
Katie laughs:"Are you sure its not so much asset as ass you want to investigate?"
Ben frowns: "Oh come on, its not like that."
Katie stares at him:"Well what is it like then? Look , the likes of him don't think in any other terms other than searching out easy meal-tickets. But they can be manipulative."
the Doctor rushes in:
"Come on , we're off, no time to explain
But we're eating" Ben retorts:
"Eat later. From what I've just heard on the radio news while in a shop, the earth could be in great danger."
As they rush after the Doctor, Katie grabs Ben's arm:
"Hey, you're not going to just leave Kyle on his own in your flat are you?"
"He'll manage, he's recovering well" Ben replies:
"I didn't mean that. He'll have his criminal mates round for a drugs party and trash the place" Katie shouts.Ben is unmoved:
"He won't. I'd better text him."
Katie gives an exasperated sigh as she follows Ben into the TARDIS......

..... to be continued.

Lord of the Reedy River: Part 8 : the CONCLUSION!

Anyway, here is the climax folks - the final part of this classic story:

Part 8

Kyle falls back into the ship after being blasted with the Tasmerleptil's laser gun, with only seconds to go before the bomb explodes.
"Looks like he's a gonner" Much observes.
"Oh no, Kyle" Ben shouts, "Cover me" he shouts across to Robin.
Ben shoots forward and into the ship while Robin and Little John fire volleys of their swishy arrows at the Tasmerleptil & Sheriff who run into the bushes.
"They're both gonners now" Much whispers to Will.
After a tense few seconds, Ben emerges from the ship, carrying an injured Kyle as fast as he can. As he staggers away into the grass the ship explodes behind him, flinging him to the ground. Kyle is moaning, stunned.
"Its ok Kyle, its ok. You did it" Ben exclaims, grasping his injured friend in his arms.

Emerging out of the bushes, the alien is insenced by the sight of his burning ship:
"This infernal planet is neither ready nor worthy of our attention."
"But what about our deal?" The Sheriff exclaims:
"Ha, do you think that matters?" The alien spits out. The Tasmerleptil then presses the button on his automatic wristband signal device. In the alien mothership the transporter room recieves the signal and beams the creature back on board. Shortly afterwards, the ship leaves the earth's orbit and shoots out into space.

Back at camp, The Doctor and Donna are being treated to a massive outlaw feast of roast wild boar and homemade bread. Much plays on a stolen lute .
"I could get used to this" Donna says: "well apart from the accomodation."
"And the leprosy" the Doctor chips in, "Never forget the leprosy."
They grin at each other and clink goblets of mead.
Meanwhile Ben is tending to Kyle who is recovering from being stunned by the gun:
"Look Kyle... this is hard for me to say but.. well I know I haven't really shown much appreciation for what you've done and I just want to say that you were brilliant today , risking your life like that. And.... well I like having you around."
"Thanks Ben" Kyle replies weakly.
The Doctor stands up and addresses the group:
"I'd just like to thank Ben for saving the earth with his idea of blowing up the ship. To Ben!" (He raises his goblet)
"Er I think you ought to include Kyle in this" Ben exclaims:
"Ok, to Ben and Kyle"
"To Ben and Kyle" the others shout, raising their goblets and rams-horn cups.


Kyle will be returned to Cambridge to recover folks however:

The Doctor,




Katie Ryan

will return soon in:


Lord of the Reedy River: part 7

part 7

The creature lunges towards the Doctor's throat , its gaping & ravenous mouth opening. However just in time an arrow swishes towards it and slams into the creature's eye with a squelch, eye matter spatting over the Doctor. The animal lets out a howl and collapses dead. Robin strides manfully out of the bushes:
"Its fortunate that I returned from the river just in time. What is that foul beast?"
The Doctor examines it carefully and then a sense of realisation permeates his mind:
"Of course...."
"What is it Doctor?" Donna asks:
"I can see now why I didn't recognise this thing the first time I saw it. This Donna is a Jarosan. The Tasmerleptils feed on these things on their home planet, swallowing them alive. They normally grow to about 6 inches in length. One must have escaped from the ship when it crashed."
Donna is puzzled:"But why the hell is this one so huge then?"
"On their home planet the Jarosans eat smaller creatures of a very low protein content. Its metabolism is completely alien. Whatever its been feeding on here, mice or voles have caused an abnormal growth occurance."

Meanwhile the Sheriff, the Tasmerleptil, Gisbourne and his men are holed up in Nottingham Castle after their encounter with Robin and the outlaws. The alien is pacing up and down ranting:
"I must return to my ship. I have important messages to communicate with my people. You must escort me back and ensure that those rebels are repelled and eliminated."
The Sheriff puts on a his best crawling voice:
"Of course sir, of course. I have a fresh contingent of men ready to leave with us. Er when can we be given the information that you promised?"
"When my task here is complete" the creature retorts.

Back at camp, Ben, Kyle and the Merry Men return from the river refreshed and renewed. "What a gorgeous morning, the smell of freshly cooked food wafting through the greenwood.... unbeatable." Ben muses.
After a quick breakfast and some mead, the Doctor suggests that they focus on the issue of the alien ship.
"What we really need is to think of how we can destroy that ship. With the Family of Blood all I had to do is get inside and tweak a few knobs, however I suspect this might not be so easy."
Much nudges Will:"I suspect Ben likes to tweak a few knobs as well" (chuckles from the Merry Men)."
We have some exploding powder" Robin chips in:
"The Sheriff had two barrels of it in the Castle and we lifted them one time."
"Its a shame that you haven't invented guns to go with it yet" Ben observes.
"Nonetheless this is excellent! " the Doctor quips, grinning.

An hour later, using materials from the TARDIS and the gunpowder, the Doctor has rigged up a decent size bomb.
"Ok folks! Lets rock" he says with a grin.
They stride down towards the river however the Doctor suddenly lets out a yelp of pain and almost drops the bomb. His foot is caught in a primitive metal rabbit trap.
"Oh its one of old Catweazle's wretched traps, he's always leaving them around." Robin says.
They free the Doctor and he hobbles on.
"Ok now keep quiet. That thing might be around here or inside the ship. One of us needs to sneak in and leave this bomb in the bowls of the ship. Move this dial here to red and you have 30 seconds to get out before -kabang! Obviously I can't hobble in. Anyone volunteer?"
"Ere I'll do it" Kyle says.
"Rather him than me" Much whispers to Will.
Kyle takes the bomb and runs into the ship, the others waiting anxiously. Suddenly they here rustling behind them and the Tasmerleptil emerges from the bushes with the Sheriff just as Kyle appears back in the ship doorway. The creature pulls out a laser gun and fires at Kyle who falls backwards into the ship.
"Oh no, the bomb is about to go off" Donna exclaims.
"Looks like he's a gonner" Much observes......

........ to be continued

Sunday, 17 February 2008

Lord of the Reedy River part 6

Anyway, here is part 6 of this epic story folks!

Suddenly the Tasmerleptil’s sensitive hearing picks up the sound of murmering from the bushes:
“We are being observed!”
The Sheriff draws his sword:
“After them you dogs!”
The Doctor shouts ‘run’ and everyone flees, while Robin and the merry men fire volleys of arrows into the Sheriff’s oafish vassals.

Back at the camp, Ben is enjoying a goblet of mead with Alan-a-Dale and Will Scarlett while they all decide what to do next. Kyle is being shown how to hold a bow by Little John.
“We must convince the Tasmerleptil that the earth is too difficult a place to try and conquer” the Doctor points out.
“Why not just kill it?” asks Robin:
“I could hide in the bushes and send an arrow through its eye”.
The Doctor is unconvinced:
“That will just bring the rest of them straight here. No we must be more cunning and subtle.”
“How about if we destroy its ship, convincing it that we have the technology to be more than a walkover in any invasion?” Ben suggests. The Doctor jumps up:
“Of Course! Excellent thinking Ben.

They decide to rest until morning, Ben enjoying a nightcap of mead and gazing lovingly at Robin, who has Marion entwined in his arms:
“He’s gorgeous. Wasted on her” he says mournfully.Donna smiles:
“Never mind Ben. I’m sure you won’t be single too long, a nice looking lad like you.”
“True enough” Ben replies.
“However that doesn’t help me tonight.”
Donna gazes into his dark, ocean-deep eyes:
“You could always come over here Ben *winks* and let me comfort you.”Ben is disconcerted:
“I don’t think that would be a good idea. I presume you aren’t getting any?”
“I’m a single woman. I was badly let down by a guy around the time I first met the Doctor. During the Racnoss affair. Ben? Ben?”Ben has fallen asleep.

Next day they are all up with the lark, Ben & Kyle joining the merry men for a skinny-dipping wash in the river, the water rippling against Ben’s smooth torso in the shimmering morning light. Meanwhile the Doctor and Donna are left at camp with Friar Tuck who is cooking breakfast over the fire, eggs sizzling in a large pan.
“Hey that’s a neat frier you’ve got friar” the Doctor quips *canned audience laughter*
Suddenly a large furry creature shoots out from the undergrowth, like a cross between a stoat and a bear. Donna screams as it pounces on the Doctor, teeth slavering……

……. To be continued.

Lord of the Reedy River part 5

Anyway, here is part 5 folks:

Gisbourne and the Sheriff reel back in horror:
"What in God's name is it?" Gisbourne utters. The creature eyes them haughtily. The Sheriff rouses:
"Stop shaking Gisbourne you gutless snape. *addressing creature* er how can we help you?"
The creature speaks:
"As my android has already informed you, all I require is some manual labour from say twenty or thirty of your vassals. And some lifting equipment. In return I can offer you knowledge that will set you above everyone else on this world."
The Sheriff grins:
"Its a deal."

Next morning, the Doctor, Ben, Kyle and Donna are waking up to the sound of forest birds. Sunlight glimmers through the trees as the merry men wash their faces in wooden buckets of river water.
"What a delightful morning, the sounds of nature all around us." Ben muses.Donna frowns:
"Well I'd much rather have spent the night in a comfy bed than on that hard ground."
Kyle is already up and brings Ben & Donna some food in a wooden bowls:
"Ere Ben , I brought ya sam of this oats & nuts."Ben looks at it unenthusiastically:
"You'd eat anything. Still I suppose its organic."
Suddenly a familiar figure comes running into the midst of them, his hands flapping about:
"Pfffffft hssss 'tis devilry pssssst brutal slavery pssst hfffft".
Much is irritated:
"Look Catweazle, can't you slow down and stop huffing and spluttering?"
"What is it old friend?" Robin asks:
"Tis the Sheriff, eye tis he. His men have rounded up yon village men, aye one an all. Put them to forced labour down at yon river, lifting ye very river bottom. And theres a vile beast with them."
Catweazle pulls a large toad out of his pocket:
"Now now Touchwood, stop wriggling."Donna *whispering to Ben*:
"That tramp keeps a toad in his pocket, foul."
"Agreed." Ben replies.
The Doctor steps forward:
"Well I suggest we go and see what they're up to."

Down by the river, the TARDIS team and merry men hide in the undergrowth watching as the creature and sheriff direct the terrified peasants in their work. Primitive lifting equipment is moving a large metallic shuttle craft vessel out of the water.
"Oh no.. " the Doctor whispers.
"What is that thing?" Ben asks:
"That Ben is a Tasmerleptil. Never seen one in that uniform before which is why I didn't recognise it before. This is worse than I expected. They come from a distant planet of evolved reptilian and amphibian races such as the Terileptils and Palpaleptils. This lot are particularly nasty, sending out scout ships to search for primitive worlds to conquer. That shuttle craft must have crash landed in the river and they'll be a mother ship somewhere in earth's orbit waiting for this guy to report back."
Ben is concerned:
"And what happens when he gets his craft repaired and communicates back to the ship that this is a medieval era culture down here?"
The Doctor frowns:
"Invasion........" be continued

Tuesday, 12 February 2008

Another Poem

The Cabbage

I perchanced to take a little walk
One misty, moisty day,
I trotted through the barley fields
And stumbled through the hay,
Eventually I rested
By a sad and crooked stile,
When beyond I saw a cabbage field,
Stretching for half a mile.

I jumped the stile and walked awhile
Through the luscious greenery,
And I thought I saw the hand of God
In this noble scenery,
When all at once I seemed to hear
A little voice cry out,
"Watch where you're treading mister,
You great bigfooted lout."

I stood back in amazement,
As I saw from whence it came,
For a cabbage lept out of the ground,
And then it spoke again,
"I am a special cabbage
And no bastard treads on me",
Whereupon it bounced about,
Most excitedly.

"Cabbages can't talk," I said,
To which it gave a huff,"
But I'm a magic cabbage
And I warn you, I am tough,
But if you take me home with you
And sit me on the shelf,
I'll bring you luck and happiness,
Money and good health.

So now he sits in his little pot,
Upon the window sill,
He chats away most charmingly,
Although he's grumpy still,
He dances to the radio
And plays a little flute,
He frightens all the visitors,
But he makes me lots of loot.

A poem

The Mischievous Imp

I am a mischievous rhymin' imp,
I live inside a tree,
I creep about when all is dark,
And no one catches me.

Sitting on my little hill,
I weave my sordid verse,
While elves and pixies toil away,
They think me quite perverse.

Some say I'm ugly, small and cruel,
A nasty little critter,
But when I dream my funny dreams
I roll around and titter.

I had a dream the other night,
I dreamt I was a cat,
I trotted out into the road,
And a car ran over me, splat!

My rhymin' mind is slick and sharp,
Just like my pointy ears,
I'm a witty little will-o-the-wisp,
A genius my dears.

Sometimes I turn into a frog,
And other times a rat,
I hide in one old woman's bed
And frighten the old bat.

I bang on doors and steal pets,
The vicar's dog, God bless,
I sit it by the old church door
Until it makes a mess.

I pretend I am a jar of jam,
A-sitting on the shelf,
I watch the people come and go,
Then try to eat myself.

Its a funny life, a rhymin' imp,
But one you cannot beat,
Theres tales to tell and tricks to play,
And lots of worms to eat.

Monday, 11 February 2008

Lord of the Reedy River: Part 4

"Lord of the Reedy River" part 4

In the castle, the Sheriff considers the Knight's offer:
"And how do we know that we can trust you? Who is this Dark Lord of whom you speak? I serve only Prince John."
The Knight lifts up its visor to reveal a completely featureless android face:
"As you can see I am not from this world. You have no choice but to enter our deal."
The Sheriff gasps.Neither of them notice a shadowy figure evesdropping behind the door, disguised in an old woman's shawl. It is Maid Marion. Back in her garret cell is Sir Guy, unconscious having been clonked in the head with a water jug.
"You must escape fair Marion", her accomplice Nellie the old handmaid says:
"And tell Robin of this devilry."

Down at the riverside, the Doctor, Ben, Donna & Kyle are poking about in the reeds and the undergrowth:
"What are we looking for Doctor?" Donna asks.The Doctor tuts:
"How the **** should I know? Footprints, bodies, spaceships who knows."
Kyle spots an area of disturbed bank:
"Ere Ben, Doctor, cam and look at this. It looks like the earth has been worn away by something crawling in and out."Ben isn't impressed:"I doubt it. More like some boat has hit the side."
"But the soil is flattened not cut into" Kyle protests.
"Don't argue Kyle. That said, you have a point."
However as they gaze at the worn away bank, something stirs benieth the water and emerges, dressed in a black uniform and wearing a helmet. It fires a lazer shot at Kyle and Ben which just misses:
"Theres only one thing to do in a situation like this," the Doctor muses, "RUN".

Arriving back at Robin's camp, they find that Marion has arrived and told Robin of the Sheriff's meeting with the 'devilish thing'. Robin explains to the Doctor :
"Hmm interesting. However there are more pressing matters. There is a creature following us. Take defensive positions!"
However it doesn't arrive and they realise that they must have shaken it off.
"Why did you lead it straight here?" Will Scarlett moans:
"Obviously the Doctor knew you would outnumber and subdue it. Please engage your brain before your mouth." Ben comments.The others laugh and thwack Will round the head.
The Doctor frowns:
"This is extremely serious. That creature is something I have not encountered before."

Later they are all lying around the campfire trying to get some rest. Robin and Marion are canoodling.Ben gazes at them and then away, his beautiful dark eyes filled with tears:
"Look at them. It makes you sick. She's got him wrapped around her finger."
Kyle throws some wood on the fire:
"Don't be like that Ben. I know that Amselm bloke has upset you."
Ben wipes his eyes:
"Theres no way I'm texting the selfish **** again when this is over. He's not worthy of my love."
"Ben, don't take this the wrong way like, but don't you think you expect too much from these blokes. What about give and take? You know theres always probs to get through in any relationship." Kyle replies.
"Oh and as if you would know anything about relationships. Do they bother with such things on your estate? Oh I'm sorry, I didn't mean that Kyle. I'm just upset. ".

Meanwhile, within Nottingham Castle, the Sheriff is nursing the head of a disgruntled Sir Guy.
"You're a useless knave Gisbourne. Letting a Maid get the better of you."
Suddenly there is a crash and a bang and the mysterious knight strides back into the castle, this time with his Lord, dressed in black. Slowly the Dark Lord raises his hands and lifts off his helmet to reveal an alien, amphibian face with globular eyes carnivorous teeth.......

....... to be continued.

Wednesday, 6 February 2008

"Lord of the Reedy River" Part 3

Anyway, here is the next part of this Doctor Who special:

The creature moves towards the opening in the bramble and prepares to pounce on Donna, its mouth slavering. However Donna gets up and asks for a knife to cut some more meat off the boar carcass. The creature, seeing the wider group, slinks off back into the undergrowth.

Meanwhile, in Nottingham, a solitary knight clad all in armour approaches the castle. As he reaches the drawbridge he is met by the Sheriff's guards. He asks in a low murmur to see the Sheriff. When they laugh and refuse him entry, he pulls out a silver phaser device and kills them. He strides into the castle......

Back at the campfire Little John and Will Scarlett are telling stories of their exploits in the forest, much to the amusement of the other merry men. However Robin is subdued and Ben moves over to him:
"You look how I feel", Ben sympathises,
"Want to talk about it?"
"The Lady who I love, Maid Marion, is being held against her will in the castle and forced to court the attentions of Sir Guy of Gisbourne. I am trying to think of a fresh way to get ourselves into the castle and rescue her before its too late."
"I'd imagine it already is, he's probably slept with her already. I suggest you focus on the more serious matter of what this creature is and how we can help you restore your credibility with the local villagers."

Suddenly a portly, round figure in a friar's habit (played by Johnny Vegas) runs into the camp all in a panic, flapping his hands *canned audience laughter*:
"Come ye quickly. Its another body in the woods. I was taking a nap under a tree and I awoke to see a large furry thing feasting on it."
The Doctor jumps up grinning:
"You must be Friar Tuck! I've always wanted to meet you. I'm the Doctor. Now lead the way."
However the Friar's eyes have focused on the food:
"You could have come and told me that the boar was ready, I'm starving."
Much the miller's son glares at him:
"We knew there wouldn't be any left for us if we did, you fat bastard."
The Doctor intervenes and condemns the insulting of Tuck:
"Ok pack it in and stop insulting people." Come on, lets see whats afoot."

They follow Tuck into the woods and find another peasant , however although he has a few bite wounds he's still alive.
"Its old Catweazle the magician" Robin exclaims.
"Come tell us what happened."
Robin gives Catweazle a drink of mead from his trusty rams-horn and the old man coughs and splutters making puffing noises:
"Aye tis the spirits... puff ... spit... Twas when I was hunting for food for Touchwood my familiar. The thing it pounced, aye twer brown an furry. But the sight of yon Friar scared it off."
"He'd scare anyone , the fat slug" Will Scarlett exclaims *canned audience booing of Will".
"Aw stop that" The Doctor intervenes,
"This is serious. Its time to pay a visit to the river...."

Meanwhile, at Nottingham Castle, the Sheriff and Sir Guy are having an enforced audience with the solitary knight. "I serve the Dark Lord. I come to ask for your assistance. We need strong men to help us restore our vessel. In return, we offer you weaponry more advanced than anything on this planet......"

- to be continued.

"Lord of the Reedy River" Part 2

Anyway, here is the next part folks:

Robin (played by Jonas Armstrong) strides up to the Doctor with a rogueish grin:
"And who might you be friends?"
The Doctor grins:
"Oh I'm just the Doctor and this is Donna, Ben and Kyle. And you are?"
"Robin's the name. Now if you just empty all of your pockets , you can be on your way."
Ben steps forward:
"Hey, am I right in thinking that you are Robin of Loxley, or Robin Hood to the locals."
Robin gazes into Ben's dark eyes, transfixed,
"Thats right".
Ben smiles:
"Amazing. Look we are from the future, the 21st century. You know your life has become a legend, where its hard to separate myth from reality. And yet here you are standing in front of us."
Robin looks puzzled. The Doctor whispers to Ben:
"I think the concept of time travel is something he'll need a fair while to get used to."
Ben empties his pockets and Robin holds up a packet of Fox's Glacier Mints, showing them to Will Scarlett:
"What have we here?"Ben smiles:
"They're mints. You'd love them, but they haven't been invented yet. Try one."
Robin opens one suspiciously and moves it slowly to his mouth, dabbing the end with his tongue. He feels a mellow sensation and sees a vision of the forest spirit. However suddenly there are shouts and they turn to see the Sheriff's men running towards them.

Robin and his men pull out their trusty bows and fire a volley of arrows, however some of the attackers get through. One goes for Robin with a sword, however Kyle has quickly picked up a sword from a dead attacker and he lunges at Robin's assailant. Robin is able to escape and fire more arrows, while the Doctor uses Venusian akido to disarm two assailants. Suddenly there is a scream from in the woods and a growling noise. The Sheriff's men stop in their tracks, petrified.
"Its getting dark... the creature. Never mind Hood, lets get out of here."
As the attackers run, Robin and the Doctor head to where the scream came from and see a bearded old peasant with his throat ripped out.The Doctor examines the body, looking worried.
"Nothing on earth at this time in History could have left these bite marks."

Later that evening, they are all sat round a campfire eating roast wild boar. Robin tells the newcomers all about the creature that emerges from the river at night.
".... it all started after the light came from the sky. Will saw it plunge into the River. The villagers are terrified, and blame us. Tis the Sheriff's doing."
Meanwhile, Ben is sat by himself, fiddling with his mobile. Kyle goes over and takes him some of the meat.
"You alright Ben?"
"Do I look alright? I can't stop thinking about Anselm. You know he was offered that job in Canada and was going to take it if I hadn't told him he should put his relationship first. Now he resents me for stopping him going. Selfish bastard."

Meanwhile, in the dark forest, something is moving slowly through the undergrowth. It sniffs the air then moves on, its fur stained with blood. It senses food nearby. Slowly it pushes by bramble until it finds an opening. It sees Donna's back as she sits by the fire. Steadily it prepares to pounce, its eyes widening and its claws extending......

....... to be continued

New Doctor Who Special Episode: "Lord of the Reedy River"

Ok, here is my pitch for one of the specials to be set after series 4.

Lord of the Reedy River

The Tardis lands in a forest clearing, the sunlight gleaming down in shafts through towering trees.
"So where are we?" Ben asks puzzled.
The Doctor had paid a visit to Cambridge earlier that day and met with Ben and Kyle in the Mermaid Wine Bar. Ben was feeling down as his boyfriend Anselm wasn't replying to his texts and the Doctor had decided to invite him to rejoin the Tardis team, bringing Kyle along.
"Who knows", the Doctor replies to Ben,
"I set the year to random. More interesting that way. Its earth though."
Donna frowns:
"Thats rather irresponsible. What if we've landed in the middle of World War Two or something?"
The Doctor is unimpressed:
"Ah thats nothing. Been there & done that with Rose. You know, the attractive companion."
He opens the Tardis door and strides out, breathing in the sweet forest air.

Meanwhile, in nearby Nottingham Castle, the Sheriff is pacing up and down looking worried. "What is all this nonsense Gisbourne. You say you're men are too scared to go out into the forest looking for Hood and his men in case it gets dark? Dark? Ye Gods man, what are they, men or mice?"
Sir Guy is adamant:
"You don't understand sir. The thing... it comes out of the river at night. Some say its a demon conjured up by Hood and his men with their pagan rituals. The bodies are always mashed to a pulp. The peasants won't leave their straw huts after dusk."
The Sheriff scoffs:
"Ha, supersticious saxon knaves! Its probably just a wolf. Still, make sure you keep spreading it around that its a forest demon conjured up by Hood. The villagers are all against him now. Soon we'll have him and his not so merry band all hung & gibbeted. Ha ha ha ha....."

The Doctor, Donna, Ben and Kyle are walking through the forest. The Doctor is whistling to himself.
"Look, have you any idea what year it is?" Donna asks.
"How should I know you daft old cow. I've told you, I set it at random."
"Hey, who are you calling a daft old cow?"
"Obviously you since I'm talking to you."

Meanwhile, Kyle and Ben are talking:
"So have you ever been to this Doctor's home planet like?"Kyle asks:
"It no longer exists. Destroyed in a war. Gone. He's the last of his kind."
Suddenly the Doctor hears something and ushers them to a halt.
"Shhhhh. I'f I'm not mistaken we are surrounded."
"Who by?" Donna asks:
"Oh I dunno. But I suspect we are about to find out......
Jumping down from the trees are the outlaws, led by Robin Hood who strides up to the Doctor with a grin on his face......

....... to be continued.